Sometime in the autumn of 1947, twin boys were born on the Southside of Chicago. One was named, “Country.” The other, “Rock.” Their parents, Blues and Folk Music, were very poor, and they feared they couldn’t provide a good home for the boys. So in a tearful, heart-wrenching act of selflessness, the parents said goodbye to their beloved offspring and left them on the steps of Mother Seton Home for Wayward Boys on 42nd and Ashland. It took no time at all for such adorable youngsters to find adoptive parents, with a catch: They were to be raised separately.
Baby Country was whisked off to the middle of nowhere: A sleepy hamlet called Nashville, Tennessee. There he was renamed “Country and Western.” His childhood was largely unremarkable, as he frolicked in the wide open spaces and lush rolling hills of rural Tennessee.
Baby Rock, meanwhile, was moved to New York City, where he was raised, well, like a rock star. There he was emulated and adored the world over by the time he turned he was in his teens. He could do no wrong…well, up until he experimented with this thing called “Disco” in the late 70s.
The twins knew deep down inside that they were different than most youngsters. But why? How? The boys lived worlds apart never suspecting that they had a long lost twin. And did they grow up fast!
Unfazed by the Disco debacle, Rock continued his youthful misadventures in search of himself. First, he grew a mullet and insisted he be called “Hair Metal” in the mid-to-late ‘80s. Then, he donned a flannel and passed himself off as “Grunge” in the early ‘90s.
Country aged a little more gracefully. His first official act of adulthood saw him legally drop his “Western” surname, and he eschewed the cheesy synthesizer sound he picked up like a rash in the ‘80s shortly after. By the time the ‘90s rolled around, Country had matured into the hottest thing going. Everywhere he went, Country made people very happy…and a lot of money.
Just after the dawn of the new century, a curious thing happened: Country and Rock met a party at Hunter S. Thompson’s mountaintop pad in Colorado. Almost immediately, they knew they had a lot of weird things in common. They laughed the night away, discovering they both had Farrah Fawcett posters in their rooms growing up; they both loved watching the Dukes of Hazzard on TV, and they both really dig racing! It didn’t take long after that chance meeting for these two to become like peas in a pod. They became inseparable…at times, indistinguishable.
This newfound friendship had far-flung effects: Toby Keith and Ted Nugent toured together; Travis Tritt and John Mellencamp recorded together; then Kenny Chesney and Uncle Kracker followed suit; Merle Haggard opened up for the Rolling Stones; Kid Rock started singing country with Hank Williams Jr.; Jonny and Donnie Van Zant, founding members of legendary bands Lynyrd Skynyrd and .38 Special, formed the band Van Zant (weird name, huh?) and recorded a hit country album; and the coup de grace: Johnny Cash was nominated for a Grammy for his rendition of a Nine Inch Nails Song!
It was absolutely freaky-All of a sudden, everywhere you looked, Country and Rock were together hand in 
hand! Along came the sound architects at Broadcast Barter Radio Networks. These folks were not only proficient in radio-related matters, but in genealogy as well. They had come across some startling information indeed regarding Country and Rock. In 2006, they thought it was high time indeed that the brothers knew their true heritage…that they shared more than friendship, they shared…blood!
After an initial period of shock, Country and Rock warmed up to the idea that they were related in the closest of ways. So much so, that they decided the time was right to throw in together as partners! They announced this landmark merger in April of ’06. And so, after decades apart, Country and Rock have reunited under the name “Blue Collar Radio” with a war cry of “This Country Rocks!” Radio, and the lives of millions of men across the country, will never be the same.
Only in America.
